did you think it was going to be that way forever?

I met a man with whom I felt a deep, loving and forever connection about ten years ago.  We entered into an intense email exchange that lasted a couple years, although the volume diminished after the initial burst of writing.

I did not know that he had gooey love relationships with many women.

I live in a silo of my own thoughts. I do not have multiple, gooey love relationships with several men, juggling men like balls. Having emotionally intimate interactions with several males at the same time would leave me confused, anxious and overwhelmed.

I want one emotionally and physically intimate life partner. And I thought this guy was a possible such partner. I didn't think so instantly but I did come to believe he was 'the one' within a few months.  

That man has severed all ties to me, shunning me. Shunning is a cruel practice but he gets to act however he chooses to act.  He didn't just pull back from getting close to me. He erased me like I am nothing and always was nothing to him.

Anyway,  at some point along the way in this relationship, this man asked me "Did you think things were going to stay as they were forever?" I thought that he was alluding to the frequent, sometimes intense level of interaction that we had shared. And, yes, I did think it was going to stay emotionally intimate forever, grow more intimate and then more so until we were cosy long-time life partners.

I don't want, or need, a lot of emotional intimates. I want one mate. And, yes indeed, my idea of a life mate is I tell him all about everything and he tells me.

And yes indeed, I did think it would last forever. But even if we had not remained close forever, I very much believed we were forever friends.

 Not.